A “donor” who gets paid is not donating. This is something about the fertility industry and the root of our origins that upsets many donor conceived people. The language and rhetoric sound nice and kind and lovely. But strip it down to the actual bare bones minimum function and purpose and things get more complicated.
After he stopped communicating with me, my biological father reverted to industry speak: He was “providing a service.” A family member who wanted to communicate with me but later changed her mind described me as “offspring” from when my biological father was a poor college student donating to make extra money. And when we were still in contact, my biological father described what he did as a “business transaction.”
When we were still in contact, my biological father described what he did as a “business transaction.”
It hurts to hear the cold truth, but my biological father did acknowledge it. My conception was a result of his need for extra money. He saw what he did as a business transaction, not some feel good donation like when you take your kids’ old toys to Goodwill. But nevertheless, future people are not, nor should they be treated like, a commodity.
Let’s stop calling people “donors” because it sounds nice when the truth is that they sell their gametes for profit.
A Donor Conceived Adult 