parent (n) – a. A father or mother; one who begets or one who gives birth to or nurtures and raises a child; a relative who plays the role of guardian. b. A caregiver or caretaker of the offspring of their own species.
Building upon yesterday’s post about how “real” is an inappropriate word choice when it comes to describing the concept of family and parentage, let’s start with what should be a fairly non-controversial discussion: whether non-genetic parents are “real” parents.
✔️ Do they occur in fact or actuality?
✔️ Do they have a verifiable existence?
✔️ Are they truly and actually raising and caring for a child?
✔️ Are they not imaginary, alleged, or ideal?
Seems to check all the boxes of what is real. 🤷🏻♀️
Moral of the story? Do not use “real” as a replacement word for “genetic.” Those words have entirely different meanings. Shared genetics are not what define whether a person is a real parent as that term is used socially.
And as for what to do when we hear “real” used to describe or ask about a family structure, if someone uses the word without ill intent, try not to take offense. The word can certainly hurt, but not everyone has had enough exposure or experience to realize why that word is incorrect. But once they know better, they can (and should) do better.
A Donor Conceived Adult 