A Donor Conceived Adult
Tiffany Gardner, an adult DCP
Tag: my story
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Top Secret: When Donor Conceived People Need Security Clearance
Little known fact: I wanted to pursue a career in the FBI after law school but my terrible eyesight disqualified me from the outset. But if I had perfect eyesight today, I don’t know that I would even try to apply. I have at least two friends who have been through the security clearance process.
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U.S. Donor Conceived Council
I am pleased to announce my involvement with U.S. Donor Conceived Council, Inc. (USDCC) as vice president of communications. USDCC was established in 2022 and is led entirely by donor conceived people (DCP) who serve on a voluntary basis. Our goal is to educate about issues important to DCPs and to advocate for changes centered
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Unhappy Donor Conceived People Can Still Be Happy People
Sometimes people get the idea that donor conceived people who talk about the realities of anonymous donation and secrecy are just a bunch of bitter curmudgeons bereft of any joy in their lives. That’s not true. I have a wonderful life. I’m married to the man I fell in love with in high school when
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The Sting of Rejection
Rejection from genetic family feels like being the kid nobody wants on the team. Do you remember the dread in PE when you were about to play a team sport and the students, not the teachers, would pick teams? I sure do. I remember the stress of standing on one side of the imaginary line
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This Ride is Exhausting
I was riding high for a couple of weeks. The Atlantic article came out, and in its wake I had doors open for more writing opportunities, podcast interviews, potential collaborations, and more. I was feeling good. Empowered. At peace. I told my therapist I felt as if the grief over my biological father was in
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We Need Support During the Search
Even if I decide to search, I still want you to be my home. Fear can be brutal, especially as a parent. You love your child and would do anything to protect them. And what could hurt more than losing your child? After my biological father ended our relationship, and after my dad died, my
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Sperm & Egg Donors Are “Real” Parents
genetic parent (n) – a. A parent who has conceived or sired rather than adopted a child and whose genes are therefore transmitted to the child. b. The father and mother whose DNA a child carries. It’s been a few days since we explored the concept of what is “real” when it comes to familial
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What is “Real”?
real (adj) – Being or occurring in fact or actuality; having verifiable existence; true and actual; not imaginary, alleged, or ideal. I never liked the idea of having a “real” dad versus a dad who was not “real.” Some people use “real” when they mean “genetic.” And unfortunately, other people use “real” to diminish someone’s
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The Need for Family Medical History
The waiting game. I’ve lost count of the number of moles I’ve had cut off and biopsied, but this week and next I will be waiting for the results to see whether one on my face is malignant or benign. When I was pregnant with my first son, a precancerous mole appeared on my ear
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Intergenerational Trauma
My oldest son turned 8 yesterday. This time with my children is flying by, just as everyone said that it would. He is insightful, sensitive, artistic, curious, kind, and funny. He loves Minecraft, Harry Potter, LEGOs, Star Wars, creating art, reading with me, and playing video games. Out of all three of my sons, he
A Donor Conceived Adult 